Lost and Found

Didnt know loosing a person from my life, from this world would make me loose my trust on her...

I had known my past for over a year and yet if I think about it I realise how little I knew about her. Her escapes from the real world, her escapes to her own shell, her escapes from the reality lead her to her death. Overdose of drugs or suicide could be termed as the cause of it but it all happened cos she wanted it from the very begining.

And during this entire journey I had my present standing with me, she said, no matter where you both end up going, I'll still be besides you. My present made me see things I was running away from, she made me realise my dream and to get back to it. The only trust which I couldnt find in my past was in my present from the start.

How did I not see it??? Why was she taken for granted??? And inspite of having her trust why did I have to go about breaking it???

It took me a lot of time to realise it, took me a lot sulking into myself, kept my eyes wet almost every nite, it scared me from going off to sleep cos tht was one place I couldnt control my mind and it took me to the stage where suicide was not considered evil.

It was only my present who could take me out of it and she did, she did it with no selfishness in spite of being hurt, she did it with the same love in spite of being betrayed, she did it with the same smile in spite of being hurt from inside...

I must have lost my past but I'm glad I found my present.I dont know what will happen the next moment, where will I be, wheer will you be, I dont know wat tomorrow will bring for me, I dont know about my future but I just hope my present ends up being my future.